Do you ever wish you were more?
More humble
More patient
More loving
More beautiful
More skinny
More creative
More wealthy
More intelligent
More active
More more more
I know that there are a lot of times when I wish I was more... something. There are many times when I feel so inadequate. So lonely, so lost, so under-appreciated, so invisible. And I know that if anybody even reads this, they feel that way some of the time too. This month on facebook, a friend challenged me to post something I am grateful/thankful for everyday in the month of November. Doing this everyday has helped me see just how much the Lord has blessed me with. It has helped me see more of His tender mercies and feel His love and his Spirit more strongly in my life.
This past week I had an amazing experience. I had been praying for something for a little while, and through a simple invitation, I answered someone else's prayers, which in turn answered mine. The Lord truly loves me and He hears and answers our prayers.
One of my all-time favorite scriptures is in the Doctrine and Covenants, section 6, verse 20 "Be faithful and diligent in keeping the commandments of God and I will encircle thee in the arms of my love. Behold I am Jesus Christ the Son of God." There are so many days when I just need a big hug, and what could possibly be better than Christ encircling me in His love? That verse has such an impact on me every time I read it. I have always struggled to believe in myself, and this scripture reminds me that the Savior is ready with His arms wide open waiting to scoop me up in His tender embrace.
The Lord has given me so much, and while there are things in my life I struggle with (lack of friendship, feelings of inadequacy, self-esteem, my weight) I know that He loves me and has blessed me with talents that I can develop (photography, intelligence, compassion, kindness, patience).
So in addition to the things I'm going to continue to post on facebook, here are 30 things I am grateful for:
1. The Gospel. I would be so lost with out the knowledge I have because of it.
2. My husband. The Lord went to a lot of trouble to put Nick in my path, and I thank Him everyday.
3. Zachary, Elder Kitterman. He is such an example and has inspired me to become a better person.
4. Sierra. Her laughter, her love, her give it to me straight up attitude. She is my best friend.
5. The scriptures. Knowledge, power, answers, inspiration - I find so much strength within their pages
6. The temple. Within it's walls I know I can always find peace and comfort and feel my Savior's love in abundance. And how grateful I am to know that I have forever instead of " 'til death do us part."
7. Photography. It has been such a bright spot in my life ever since I got my camera almost 2 years ago.
8. Ice cream. Mmmmmmmmm
9. Panera in Temecula. Life is good.
10. Chocolate and Peanut butter. They were made for each other. Best way to eat a banana? Spread on some peanut butter, dip into bag of mini chocolate chips, bite. Repeat until banana is gone. The same goes for apple slices.
11. My Ex Boyfriends. It sounds funny, but I am thankful for each boyfriend/fling/crush because they each taught me an important lesson about what kind of man I wanted, as well as invaluable lessons about myself and the kind of person I am/want to be, and if I hadn't dated each one, I don't think I would have ever given my husband a chance.
12. My journal. What a mind saver. It seriously keeps me sane.
13. Batman flannel. I will be even more grateful for it in about a week once it has been transformed into Batman pajama pants.
14. Crochet hooks and yarn. Call me an old lady, but I love to crochet.
15. Sleep. Oh how I love you sleep, and wish we could spend more time together.
16. Bella. I know there will always be someone so excited to see me they practically wet themselves.
17. My Primary Kiddos. They teach me SOOOOO much more than I teach them, and I love them more than I ever thought possible.
18. BYU. I may not have finished what I started there, but I learned more about myself in those two years than I ever would have been able to otherwise. I am the woman I am today because of the friendships I developed and experiences I had there.
19. Hoodies. I would LIVE in a hoodie everyday of the year if the weather permitted.
20. High heels. Kind of contradictory to #19, but I would also wear high heels every day of the year if my feet permitted. They just make me feel so sexy.
21. Flat Irons. My hair would be a hot mess without them.
22. Megan. I love you so much Megs. You know why I am grateful for you.
23. Pink Berry. So darn delicious.
24. Good Books. I love to read and get lost in a world other than the one I live in.
25. 2011. Nick's graduation, homeownership, parenthood (may actually be 2012). Please?
26. Music. Joy, sorrow, gratitude, chillaxation, excitement, anger... so many emotions can be expressed and felt in so many different ways, each one unique and beautiful (most of the time)
27. Tithing. I have seen so many blessings in my life from this one simple commandment.
28. My Job. Even though most of the time I hate it, I am incredibly grateful that I have a job so I am able to pay my bills. I know a lot of people that aren't as fortunate as I am.
29. The Priesthood. I have seen it work miracles and have been on the receiving end of a few of them. I am grateful to have a husband who honors the priesthood and keeps himself worthy of it's power.
30. Jesus Christ. Of all of these things, I am probably most grateful for my Savior and His sacrifice. He suffered, bled, and died for me. He loves me and knows me better than I even know myself. He has experienced every single emotion that I will ever feel so that He can know how best to comfort me. And I know that if I keep His commandments, that He will encircle me in the arms of His love and I will be able to live with Him again someday.
